Humanity i love you

Since March of 2020, I feel like I have done nothing but grieve, in so many different directions and for so many different reasons.  None of them go away, they just pile one upon another.  There were (and still are) those who are afraid and uncertain about Covid; those who are sick, or dying, or losing loved ones; those who are trying valiantly to do their jobs and are being berated, abused, and threatened.  There were (and still are) media figures in positions of trust and responsibility who are failing, utterly, to do their duty to provide their fellow citizens with facts.  There were (and still are) people whose personal ambitions are eating away at the very foundations of our democracy.  There were (and still are) people who want to deny the past, without grasping that they are thereby endangering out future.  There were (and still are) people who are so consumed by fear that they would rather destroy than understand.  There were (and still are) people who are sucked in by lies and misinformation and conspiracy theories, and led to do foolish and hurtful things.  There were (and still are) Black men and women who are disrespected, threatened, injured, and killed by those who swore an oath to protect and serve.  There were (and still are) women who are being denied control over their own bodies.  There were (and still are) people who want nothing more than the freedom of self-determination who are being threatened and invaded and killed.

As a historian, I know that this too shall pass.  As a human being, I am always just thisclose to tears.


Humanity i love you
because you would rather black the boots of
success than enquire whose soul dangles from his
watch-chain which would be embarrassing for both

parties and because you
unflinchingly applaud all
songs containing the words country home and
mother when sung at the old howard

Humanity i love you because
when you're hard up you pawn your
intelligence to buy a drink and when
you're flush pride keeps

you from the pawn shop and
because you are continually committing
nuisances but more
especially in your own house

Humanity i love you because you
are perpetually putting the secret of
life in your pants and forgetting
it's there and sitting down

on it
and because you are
forever making poems in the lap
of death Humanity

i hate you.

E. E. Cummings